Garden In Progress

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                time tracing down a dirty cheek

    dripping from a scraped chin

                           puddles of decay following battle

                                                   stubbornly growing cribbled roses

                                                                          wounded by hyena behavior

                                                                                              licking their own salt crusted petals

                                                                and the gardener is smiling

                                                    as she walks away

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6 thoughts on “Garden In Progress

    realityenchanted said:
    December 28, 2012 at 11:23 pm

    Nice. Flowed well for me, except the part of licking salt crusted petals which I didn’t quite understand.

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      realityinprogress responded:
      December 28, 2012 at 11:50 pm

      Thank you. The roses have grown from tears, hence the salt – maybe it should have been ‘wounded roses’ instead of ‘cribbled’… I didn’t think it through too much, just kinda let it form.

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        realityenchanted said:
        December 29, 2012 at 12:03 am

        Ha! Now with this apt explanation, I daresay this was a beautiful poem. Flows perfectly. Simple words and descriptions that take one’s mind as close to the raw experience as one could get without being the actual gardener and roses.

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          realityinprogress responded:
          December 29, 2012 at 12:10 am

          :) I’m glad it made a little more sense now. And thank you so much for caring enough to ask, that’s very valuable to me.

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    realityenchanted said:
    December 29, 2012 at 12:15 am

    It made a lot more sense.
    You are warmly welcome. I try not to deceive myself or the writer.

    Like

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