of a power
an echo of an ancient river
roots searching deeper
exposing layers of buried light
kissing life into sleeping seeds
ascending towards greater wisdom
reflected in grey eyes
on a freezing December day
there was a mission
two agents of space and time
traveled across the wide waters
through clear frosty skies
carried by the full moon
twirling in the ray of good will
blowing fuses in the gaze of the Capricorn
continuing on with rosy cheeks
and a clearer vision
following adventure with the sun on our backs
What an amazing day!
I’ve just returned home, sizzling with gratitude after spending the day celebrating life, honoring Earth and playing with the elements. A big group of people gathered with the same intention, a huge circle of candles and torches and inside it a fire and crystal mandalas. Sending out wishes for the year to come, fire dancing, meditating and channelled messages from entities that I very strongly feel but nevertheless can’t see. Reconnecting with people whom I’ve missed, reconnecting with a part of me I’d temporarily neglected. Freezing my butt off on a Scandinavian muddy field but boosting the fire in my heart.
These past few weeks has been an escalating process, concluding a year of growing insight and I’m left with a slight feeling of dizziness and a profound feeling of coming full circle. It’s not all going to be rainbows and butterflies but in this moment I’m peaceful and have nothing but acceptance of everything that is.
What a wonderful day in an amazing life – and it isn’t over yet.
.. and then there are quiet days ..
.. when you look out at the world around you ..
.. from a peaceful world within ..
[what? maybe it doesn’t matter. maybe there’s nothing to say. maybe i’m just empty of words. and thoughts. or too full.]
Being silent is wonderful and not difficult at all. When you’re alone, that is. The challenge starts when people around you expect you to actually respond and participate in conversations. Work is not ideal, either. I work with teenagers with various personality disorders and if I suddenly just keeps quiet, they’re going to freak out – literally – and it will be messy. Grocery shopping is doable. I guess I don’t come across as super polite but I smile and nod and hope the cashier is feeling my silent appreciation.
I’m trying to stay conscious of why I don’t feel like talking. Or listening. Mostly I just feel content being in my own bubble, silently communicating with life around me. Actual people not so much included. But in all honesty, there’s also a trace of simply not seeing the point anymore. Not recognizing the relevanse of what I or anyone else could possibly have to say. Who cares? We can talk all we want, it doesn’t change anything. It’s just words. I’m pretty sure this is just a phase. I mean, it must be. However, I’m also pretty sure that the trace is expanding and it does look suspiciously like the intro to what could be a genuine loss of meaning.
Well, before I declare myself depressed I will continue to embrace the silence and let this process progress.
– but probably not give in to the urge of selling all my stuff and relocating to a secluded beach hut..
i wanted to write something about how I lately have desired silence. something about experiencing life in a free flow. something about being. and being quiet. something about reflecting instead of thinking. i deleted it all. i wonder how long this will last..
life is full of sound but underneath it all and in between it all there’s silence.